A Late TGIF

I've been kind of down in the dumps this week.  I have a hard time with transitions, more than I like to admit.  And it's always easier said than done to "be yourself" and just relax into situations and people.  I'm having a hard time staying in touch with old friends and I'm trying to make new friends.  bbaahh.

But tonight was good.  I was a little grumpy today, but a good talk with Mom and a night with people I work with in a different environment I'm seeing things in a brighter light.

How Am I Trusting?

I'm trusting exercise.  As I said I was grumpy today, and I forced myself to go for a run.  Even though it was a 2 mile jog, I felt so much better afterwards.  Why do I always forget how running makes me feel?  No matter what mood I'm in, I always feel happier, lighter.  I am trusting that I need to take care of myself in this way - not only for physical health but mental health.  
 
How Am I Grateful?

I'm grateful for this experience I'm going through.  Even though it's hard and seems never ending.  I've been in transition mode since last July!  I start to question everything I'm doing, start to wonder if I'm doing what I should be and where I should be and if I'm even happy with what I'm doing.  But without these moments, I would not have a chance to really practice a mindful, calm approach.  I'm forcing myself to really break things down, instead of just reacting to my feeling in that moment.  I'm grateful for the chance to practice/test my strength.

I'm also thankful for my parents.  It's so nice to be so close to them, especially in this transition I'm going through.  Even though I was grumpy with my Dad today, he's still my father and tries his best for me.  I'm happy I can always call my Mom and she says the right things to make me feel a little better.  

How Am I Inspired? 

I'm inspired by experiences.  Tonight I finally got to hang out with people from the Ranch for the now former Farm Manager's going away party.  Every experience is a learning moment.  I'm learning how to be OK with who I am.  Tonight was a dance party.  I do love to dance, but I wasn't feeling it for most of the night.  And you know what, that's OK!  I don't have to be the one out there in the middle of the dance floor, I don't have to be the one dancing in the corner.  But I can be the one in the middle or in the corner, or right where I was tonight, chatting with people, watching the dancers, laughing.  Every experience inspires me to be ok with just who I want to be in that very moment.


How Am I Practicing Faith?

Tonight I took a ride in the back of a 1963 baby blue Chevy.  It's been so long since I road down back roads in a pickup.  I felt very happy and calm.  It's those unexpected moments that give me faith that I'm doing OK.