A Machete and Ham...?

Last night I had a dream.  A weird dream.  I think I may have been dead.  I definitely was invisible to everyone around me.  I feel like in the dream I knew I was dead, but I was trying to fight well, death.  Death was this weird Asian man, who kind of reminded me of Jack Sparrow.  He had beat my sister (but definitely wasn't my real sister), but I knew that I had to beat him.  They had been fighting with machetes.  I hugged my sister and then picked up the machete and just practiced, got in shape, I knew how to fight.  I was just running around waving this machete.  Anyway, I then was at the grocery store, and all the cashier had was ham, bagging it up (I think that was because we had ham for lunch yesterday).  Then I got stuck in the the double glass doors and I knew that the weird Asian Death Man was coming.  But then I woke up. 

What the crap was that!?

So I looked up ham and machete.  This is what I found:

"To see a machete on the ground before you indicates an opportunity to make a positive step towards personal fulfillment. You must summon the courage to pick it up." (http://www.dreamforth.com/dream/machete.html)

 








  "To dream about hams suggests that you are dealing with some tough emotional issues at the moment.  This symbol can also be a metaphor for wishing you had more attention bestowed upon you." (http://www.dreamforth.com/dream/ham.html)





Well, I can tell you that I am dealing with some tough emotional issues.  I guess in some way I am wishing I had more attention on me.  The CEO at this company I'm working at barely acknowledges I exist.  It's frustrating and half the time I wonder why I'm even here.  And now the CEO is baiting me, telling me that my house that was suppose to be ready last fall will be ready in a week.  Seriously? (that's sarcastic)   

To stay or to go?  Do I make other dreams into goals?  Do I continue this job?  Do I proceed with another path that could change the way I feel about farming?  I'm starting to loose a faith in this field.  I've been trying for years to find happiness at farming.  And at first it goes wonderfully.  But then, things out of my control just start to break my heart again.  I know that's life, things are always out of your control.  But do I sit and take the CEO treating me like I'm not the manager?  Or my own direct boss?  I spent so much time fighting at my old job, I don't know if I have the heart to do it again...

But I picked up the machete after I hugged my sister.  So, will I make the right decision in my career that fills me personally?  I wish the dream just told me what that decision was suppose to be.